1) Determine what type of service
is best for you.
There are five
different types of online dating services that
you have to select from. Make sure you select the ones
that match up with your goals.
The first are General
Online Dating Services. These are services that provide
you with the ability to view everyone who has posted
a profile and are generally aimed at dating. Such
services include: Match.com, LavaLife, and FriendFinder.
The second are Relationship Services.
These are services that match you with others based
on compatibility testing and are generally for those
more serious about a relationship or marriage. Such
services include eHarmony and Chemistry.com
.
The third are Social Network Services.
These are free sites that allow you to build your base
of
friends and potentially find someone to date in the
process. Such services include MySpace, Friendster and Orkut.
The fourth are Niche
Dating Services.
These are services aimed at bringing together people,
to date, who share a specific common passion or desire.
Such services include Green
Friends (vegetarians), Equestrian
Cupid (horse lovers), Millionaire
Match (rich singles), Age Match (Intergenerational Dating),
and Senior
Match (older singles).
The fifth are Merging Online Dating
Services. These services combine online dating with
offline
applications. For example, Peek
a Bio and Chick
n Chit allow you to post a profile then hand
out specially printed cards to people you meet in
everyday
life who you are interested in. Using the card, these
people can access your hidden profile to learn more
about you.
Decide which service(s) best meet your
need, then pursue it!
2) Follow important online
dating safety tips.
From the time you sign up for a service through the
time you meet on a date, it's important to be safe.
Read Online Dating Magazine's Online
Dating Safety Tips article for specific
things you should and shouldn't do. In a nutshell:
never give out too much personal information; never
give a home phone number; always meet in a public place
for the first date; ask for a recent photo (or how
old posted photos are); and trust your gut instinct.
Read the article for
more safety tips and full descriptions.
3) Build a winning profile.
Your profile is one of the two key elements that will
determine if a person emails you on an online dating
service (the other is photo - see next tip). Thus
it's important to make sure that your profile is
lively, fun, and positive. Avoid negatives (I'm lonely,
I can't believe I'm doing this) at all costs. Examine
other profiles and determine what about it makes
you more interested or less interested. Read Online
Dating Magazine's Profile
Tips article for more advice. If a person finds
your profile interesting and not generic then you
have increased your chances of someone showing interest
in you. Make yours interesting!
4) Post great recent photos.
Face it - when doing a search on an online dating
service the first thing that grabs your attention
is the photo. This is the single most important
element
to getting people to view that great profile you've
written (see last tip). These days, generic photos
won't cut it. You need to determine what colors
look best on you, dress nice, be clean cut, and
have someone
take various photos of you that are fun and lively.
When I changed my photo from a posed shot to a
shot of me with an Orangutan, the number of people
emailing me or showing an interest quadrupled.
It also provided
a great ice breaker and talking point when someone
emailed me. Read Online Dating Magazine's Creating
a Better Online Dating Photo article for some excellent
tips.
5) Learn effective communication techniques.
Your first email to someone you're interested in is
the most important one you'll ever write because
it will
help
determine
whether or not they write back.
It's important to personalize your introductory email and spend more time asking
questions (based on the other person's profile)
than providing information about yourself. Throwing a
compliment in doesn't hurt either (i.e. "I love your
smile" or "your profile is one of the best I've read").
Learn some good communication techniques by reading
some of these Online Dating Magazine articles and
columns: 12
Keys to Better Online Dating Communication |
Dating
From the Inside Out | Connect.
6) Always be respectful of others.
By learning to respect others, you enhance your character.
Being respectful means not being lewd (in communicating
with others) and not "dropping off the face of the
earth" when you move on. One of the biggest complaints
we receive is from people who say the person they were
communicating with just "disappeared" and
stopped communicating. It's very disrespectful
when you don't send a polite message letting other
people know that you are moving on.
7) Avoid white lies.
In the world of online dating, white lies take on
many forms, including: posting a photo more than
nine
months old; lying about your age; lying about your
income; lying about your job. The simple fact is
that you are likely looking for your soul mate,
so at some point in the dating relationship, those
lies
will come back to haunt you. Always be honest and
truthful in everything you say and post. By always
telling the truth, you'll never have to remember
what you said!
8) Learn how to better identified
and avoid married people.
It's a sad fact that nearly 1/4th of people who
participate in online dating are married. Whether
looking for a way to cheat or trying to see what
they "missed
out"
on, these people are a menace to people seeking true
relationships. Married people will be extremely secretive
and irregular in their communication with you. If
you reach the point of talking on the phone, you'll
get
their cell phone answering machine a lot and calls
will be returned on an irregular basis. They generally
won't post a picture or will post one that is dark/grainy.
After all, they don't want a friend or family member
to come across their profile! Learn more tips by
reading Online Dating Magazine's How
to Stay Clear of Married Men article. Avoid married
people at all costs. As the adage goes: once a cheater,
always a cheater.
9) Make the first date memorable.
The concept of success with online dating doesn't
end with getting a date. Your actual date is going
to
shape the other person's opinion more than anything
else to date. Thus it's important that you make
a great first impression. As the saying goes, you
never
get a second chance to make a great first impression.
Be confident on your date. Confidence is one of
the biggest attractions you can posses. Learn some
great
first date tips by reading the following Online
Dating Magazine articles: 10
Tips to Getting a Second Date and Beyond | 10
Important Dating Tips for Men | First
Date Do's and Don'ts.
10) Avoid becoming a professional
online dater.
Online Dating Magazine coined the term "professional
online dater" to describe the growing number of people
becoming addicted to online dating. The addiction
is bad enough that it effects relationships and potential
relationships, while hurting others in the process.
And hurting others should be the last thing you want
to do. A professional online dater is one who is
on
several dating services, going out on several dates
regularly, and always thinking "the next one may
be better". If he/she enters into a relationship,
they
just hide their profile (versus deleting it) and
at the first sign up trouble in a relationship, they
generally return to the online dating world instead
of working out the issues. A professional online
dater
generally just "drops off the face of the earth"
instead of telling you he/she is no longer interested
in communicating.
For more information, read the Online Dating Magazine
article, Avoid
Becoming a Professional Online Dater.
