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Online Dating Magazine > Columns > Dating Triumphs & Tragedies > First Date Nightmares

Dating Triumphs and Tragedies
by Nicole Roberge

More First Date Nightmares

Last week I wrote about my friend’s, Phil and Alexa’s, first date nightmares.  They were scary, yet funny, and I had a good time listening to them and writing about them.  Then I realized how many first date nightmares everyone has, including myself.  So I decided to share some of my own, to prove that yes, I am human, and that everyone has that first date that doesn’t go quite right.

There was one in particular that I remember that was daunting both physically and mentally.  We met online, he was a great guy and I was so excited to finally meet him.  Unfortunately, at the time, I was sick and on a special diet—pasta being on of the things I shouldn’t eat.  When we decided to make plans to meet, he suggested dinner.  Where should we go?


“Have you ever been to ‘Pete’s Pasta?’” he asked.

“No, I haven’t,” I replied, while pleading with myself that he not suggest we go there.

“Then we have to go there,” he said.  “It’s my favorite restaurant, you’ll love it.”

“Okay,” I said, reluctantly, and in a few days, off to Pete’s it was.

I was there early, so I got to peruse the menu.  It was pasta, pasta, and more pasta.  I was in for a doozy of a night.

However, when he showed up with a big smile, I was somewhat relieved.  Here was this great guy who wanted to go out with me, had no idea I couldn’t eat pasta, and I was happy all the same.  We looked at the menu together and he recommended a dish.  So yes, I got pasta.  I was on a date, it was where he wanted to go, and I had no choice.  I was scared, unsure of the pasta or the date, but I did both and succeeded, though frightened.  Okay, I only ate a little of the pasta.  It seemed like a nightmare at first, but it turn into drinks afterward, and then a second, third date, and so on…  So sometimes, plugging through those nightmares can be worth it.

But…then there was the guy I recently went out with.  While sitting at dinner, it seemed okay, but every time he talked about himself, he would look away.  When I talked, he would look right at me.  Then I would ask him a question, and he’d look away while talking.  I just wanted to scream, “What are you looking at?”  But I didn’t.  I figured it was some form of nervousness or shyness and just let it go on, as annoying as it was.  There was no second date.

One guy started talking marriage on a first date.  We went for sushi, which I never tried but proclaimed I hated, yet tried to give it a shot.  Soon into the date, he started telling me how much he liked me.  How great it would be if I just stayed over his place all the time and did my writing over there.  How he was really looking to settle down.  Hello!  This is a first date!  Warning, warning!  He truly wanted me to practically live at his place after one date, and I was definitely not ready for that.  Plus, we ended up hanging at his place and he watched a Scrubs DVD and sang the theme song every time it came on. Next, please…

Then there was the pool player.  We went on a date and had pizza, which seemed normal.  It was a lunch date and then we went to his place to play pool.  Pool is fun, right?  I think I was winning, by luck, mostly, and it was his shot.  He asked me to give him a kiss for good luck.  When I realized I grossed out by doing that, I knew he wasn’t the guy for me.  But that didn’t stop him.  He grabbed for the kiss, the sloppy kiss, and I hoped that was all the good luck he needed.  I let him win and soon I was on my way.

First dates are tricky.  Whether you go out for lunch, dinner, drinks, or anywhere.  You are learning about the person you are with and whether you may or may not be compatible.  You may not even know that answer until the second or third date.  But what you will know on the first date is whether or not you can tolerate the person on a second date.  There will be things that he or she may do that might drive you nuts, or in a good case, drive you wonderfully crazy.  That’s what first dates are for—to let you know how you feel about that person.  An introductory statement.  If you get the gut feeling it’s not gonna work, then get out while you can.  Trust me.  But if you get the inkling that you wouldn’t mind him in you life, hang on to the idea of a second date.  Quirks and all, it might just be work it.


Dating Triumphs and Tragedies is published every Sunday by Online Dating Magazine columnist Nicole Roberge. She can be reached at

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