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Online Dating Magazine > Columns > Dating Triumphs & Tragedies > Holiday Dating

Dating Triumphs and Tragedies
by Nicole Roberge

Holiday Dating
Being Single During the Holidays

Yes, folks, it’s that time of year again.  The turkeys are out, the holidays are coming, and that means family time, and of course, dating.  But does that mean just family stuff, or time for dating too?

When families get together, the question always comes out: are you dating anyone?  Oh, that dreaded question.

With my family, it used to be directed towards my sister.  Except in her case, she was dating someone, and the question was, “When are you going to get married?”  Lucky her.  She hated that question and when her boyfriend was there, it made it all the more awkward.  But now they are married and they haven’t gotten the kids questions yet.  Yes, lucky them.

Now, I am next in line.  And I get those questions like, “When are you gonna bring us home a nice boy to meet?”  What do I say to that?  Hmm…why don’t you bring me along a nice boy and then I’ll be all set!  Problem solved.  But it’s not that easy.  Families are always looking for you to be in a relationship, and from what I’ve seen, looking for that next marriage.  And yes, it can be completely draining.  I usually just tell them, “I’ll let you know when he comes along,” and that silences them for the most part.  But with the holidays upon us, who knows what questions will be asked?

So how do you make it through the holidays?

Do you have that crazy aunt who is always telling you that you better get married now before there aren’t any men left?  Ah, yes, I’ve heard of that aunt.  I have a great aunt who just told me I had a big day coming up, turning 27, and that I was going to be an old lady.  Old lady?  Agh!  Since when is 27 an old lady?

But the thing that you have to take into perspective is that these are your older relatives commenting on what your life should be like.  Things were different for them.  My Mom got married in her early 20’s.  My grandmother got married at 19.  Things aren’t the way they used to be.

So when it comes to family gatherings, of course, they want to know what is going on with your love life.  It makes it interesting for them.  It’s news to them.  Though, it may make you want to hide behind a couch.  So, just how do you deal with it?

The best thing is to tell them the truth.  Don’t sugarcoat it.   Don’t tell them that you are dating a certain guy and things are going well just to please them.  That won’t do anyone any good.  It can be hard, and awkward, since you’re really on the spot, but the truth is always the best.  If you are casually dating someone, tell them that you have met someone and are dating and just seeing where things are going, but you are happy at the moment.  Hearing that you are happy should make them happy enough.

If you are in a relationship and can delve into those details, I am sure they will want to hear about it.  Just be careful as to how many details you want to spill.  The best case would be to tell them that you are in a good relationship and the man you are with is wonderful.  And yes, hopefully, that is the case.

If you are single, tell them that.  Don’t shy away from the truth.  Tell them that currently, you are single, though may be dating, but you are happy with your lifestyle and when the right guy comes along, you will know it.

Dealing with families around the holidays can be difficult but it can be done.  Yes, often times family members have their questions, but you can definitely work around them and tell them your situation in the best way.  Be proud of where you are and what you are doing.  So what if you’re not in a relationship?  Many people aren’t.  You’ll get to that point.  Maybe now isn’t the best time.  But if they’re you’re family, they’ll understand, and they will want the best for you.  Just believe that.

 


Dating Triumphs and Tragedies is published every Sunday by Online Dating Magazine columnist Nicole Roberge. She can be reached at NicoleMRoberge@hotmail.com.


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