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Online Dating Magazine > Columns > Dating Triumphs & Tragedies > Men, Women, & Computers

Dating Triumphs and Tragedies
by Nicole Roberge

If Men and Women Were Computers
We're Not So Different...

My friend sent me this joke recently.  You know, one of those jokes that you get forwarded and you’re like, “Oh geez, what is this crap?”  But then you read it and it’s kind of funny, so you forward it to a bunch of people, and they probably go through the same routine.  Anyway, that’s just so we’re on the same page.  So you know what I was thinking when I get an email and the subject line was “Fwd: PC…..Male or Female….so true!”  Oh geez, I thought, what is this?

 

But I actually read it and I found myself laughing and I forwarded it on to my friends and family but then realized that I needed to share this with more people.  I needed to share it with you.  Ah yes, it deals with men and women and their differences, but what I think is more their commonalities.  Here, I will let you read it first:

A Spanish Teacher was explaining to her class that, in Spanish, and several other languages, unlike English, nouns are designated as either masculine or feminine.   'House' for instance, is feminine: 'la casa.' 'Pencil,' however, is masculine: 'el lapiz.’  ‘So,’ a student asked, 'what gender is  'computer'?  'Instead of giving the answer, the  teacher split the class into two groups, male and female, and  asked them to decide for themselves whether 'computer' should be  a masculine or a feminine noun.

Each group was asked to give four reasons for its recommendation.  The men's group decided that  'computer' should definitely be of the feminine gender ('la  computadora'), because:

1. No one but their creator understands their internal logic.
2. The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else.
3.  Even the smallest mistakes are stored in long term memory for possible later retrieval.
4. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your paycheck on accessories for it.

The women's group, however, concluded that computers should be Masculine ('el computador'), because: 

1 In order to do anything with them, you have to turn them on.
2. They have a lot of data, but still can't think for themselves.
3. They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they ARE the problem.
4. As soon as you commit to one, you realize that if you had waited a little longer, you could have gotten a better model.

The women won.

It was then to be sent this to all the smart women you know...and all the men that have a good sense of humor.

Yes, it’s amusing, and I’m sure the guys agree with all of their four points, and the ladies agree with theirs, but you know what, you could probably swap them and there would be the same result.  Or at least most of them.  Let’s examine this a little.

Let’s look at the male version.

No one but their creator understands their internal logic.
Well, that’s just true for anyone, silly boys.  That’s why you have to get to know someone.  And, I’ve heard plenty of women saying that they can’t understand what’s going on inside the head of the guy they’re dating.  And I can agree.  I dated a guy once who believed communication was the priority—fantastic!  But I couldn’t get him to talk about anything in his life.  Go figure.  Next…

 The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else.
I have a friend from college and people used to say that we had our own language.  Ha!  We had nicknames for people and would talk in code and could just look at each other and know what the other was thinking.  But…wait…do guys kind of do the same?  I’ve seen plenty of males do that head nod and know what it means…probably about some girl.  We all communicate with our friends in a special way.  It’s why we’re friends.  That’s how we get each other.

Even the smallest mistakes are stored in long-term memory for possible later retrieval.
Please.  Guys do that too.  Who doesn’t?

As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your paycheck on accessories for it.
Guys say that so they have something to blame it on.  But in reality…they like buying little things for the lady in their lives.  And hey, if I’m in a relationship, I like buying special things for the guy in my life.  So there.

Now, let’s stop picking on the guys and look at the female version:

In order to do anything with them, you have to turn them on.
Hehehe.  Okay, that’s funny.  It is.  And guys do have that reputation.  But when you find the guy, you know there’s more to them to that.  And come on girls, you know you have that special button too.

They have a lot of data, but still can't think for themselves.
I’m indecisive.  Enough said.

They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they ARE the problem.
Someone in some relationship always seems to be the problem.  But in my experiences with males, they always want to be the problem-solvers.  From my male friends to guys that I have been in relationships with, it’s just something that comes naturally to them, and something that can be appreciated.  Unless that’s the only thing they do.

As soon as you commit to one, you realize that if you had waited a little longer, you could have gotten a better model.
Well here we go—the case of the bitter breakup.  Things are great for a while, and then, not so great.  That’s dating.  Like computers.  You find one you like, things are going great, and then, something fails.  One program, or function, or some commonality, isn’t what you thought it was, and doesn’t work so great anymore—for either of you.  And yes, it is time to “trade” in that model.

So basically, computers are like dating.  But more so, they can’t be seen as male or female, because when it comes down to it, males and females are in fact more alike than we think.  Yes, we can be vastly different, but we’re usually looking for the same things in a relationship, and we know what we’re not looking for.  And that is what makes it so great when we find that thing we are looking for.  That certain “model” that makes us happy and know that we have found the right match.  The compatible piece in our lives that makes us function all the better.  And I’m pretty sure that a person is much, much better than computer.


           

Dating Triumphs and Tragedies is published every Sunday by Online Dating Magazine columnist Nicole Roberge. She can be reached at NicoleMRoberge@hotmail.com.


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