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Online Dating Magazine > Columns > Jennifer's Gems > Serenity

by Jennifer Brown Banks

Things that Sabotage Your Serenity

As a creative artist, I relish serenity.

Silent surroundings allow me to still my soul, contemplate the complexities of life, and connect to my creative source.

Sure, on occasion I dig loud, bar music, chatty conversations, and the sounds of a child's laughter when something tickles their funny bone.

But, by and large, I prefer peaceful settings, harmonious relationships, the sanctuary of home, and the stillness of nature.

Yet, as a big city dweller, I'm often accosted by loud, boisterous people, larger-than-life sounds, and loud images that wreak havoc with my sensibilities.

Take for instance this morning. Something as simple as a doctor's office checkup left me   freaked out and frazzled: loud, rude passengers on public transportation, kids screaming in the waiting room, sirens blaring through rush traffic, boom boxes boasting the lyrics of today's rappers.

It seems there's noise pollution everywhere!  Even libraries have ceased to be the havens of peace they once were.

Which begs the question...What disrupts your daily peace? How do you find “calm” in a tumultuous world and fast times? How do you escape, meditate, and remain centered amidst the madness?

Here are six often overlooked serenity stealers and remedies for your renewal

  1. YOUR FINANCES--- Are you overburdened and under-resourced? You are not alone. Those of us who have been living from paycheck to paycheck and consumed by credit card debt are in for a rude awakening.  The “job security” that we once embraced is now a thing of the past. Word to the wise.. save for that rainy day now! And have a side gig.

    I learned this lesson the hard way, when I was unexpectedly downsized from a job of four years, with no savings to fall back upon. There's nothing like not knowing where your next meal will come from to cause tremendous stress and sleepless nights! Plan accordingly.

  2. YOUR HEALTH---”Health is the greatest wealth.” Though there are many health related conditions and disorders that we genetically inherit, there are quite a few that we have the power to control. For example, statistics show that African-Americans are disproportionately obese, largely due to lifestyle.  Choose to eat better. Exercise more. Eat fast food less. Consume smaller portions. Obtain routine screenings. As they say, “an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.”

  3. YOUR RELATIONSHIPS---Contrary to popular opinion, a bad relationship is not better than having none at all.  The Bible tells us to guard our hearts for good reason---it's the corridor to our souls.  Put as much effort and discernment in choosing a mate as you would your job, place of residence, or career. It will bring peace of mind and unspeakable joy.

  4. YOUR SURROUNDINGS---Is your home full of clutter and chaos? It shouldn't be. It doesn't matter hether it's a bachelor's pad, a starter home in the country, or a home with rent to own options. Where you lay your head is your retreat from the world, and other than work, most likely where you spend the most time. Adorn it with beautiful accessories and treasured photos of loved ones. Keep it clean and orderly. Decorate it to reflect your distinct personality. Pimp your pad out!

  5. YOUR GIG--- Do you look forward to facing a day at work, or does it cause depression and doubt?  Our vocations should ideally be what we are passionate about, and what we do well.  Many times it is not.  I know of dozens of people who toil at jobs daily that deplete them of their peace and sense of worth, because they feel they have to.  I was once one of them. However, this doesn't always have to be the case. Sometimes it's just a matter of getting additional training, or going back to college, or taking an entrepreneurial path. Other times it's doing away with self-limiting beliefs. Take a career inventory then take steps to pursue work that is meaningful and marketable.

  6. YOUR STATE OF MIND---Few recognize that if you change your thoughts, you can change your quality of life. Elevate your thoughts. BEGIN TODAY.

By addressing these six areas, you'll enjoy maximum pleasure with minimal fuss.


Jennifer's Gems
is a weekly column written by award-winning poet and writer, Jennifer Brown Banks. It is published every Wednesday.
Click here to read her welcome letter.

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