Time to Forget and Move On

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Online Dating Experience 35
Time to Forget and Move On
20 year old female from Trinidad

I met this guy called Thomas on Yahoo! Personals. Apparently he saw my profile and decided to message me. At first, of course, I didn't really take much notice of him but I continued to talk to him. We switched to MSN because it was easier to webcam there and we webcammed a lot! He was a bit older than me. I was 18 at the time and he was 35. He told me about himself' he worked with a software solutions company (it's probably the 2nd in world next to Oracle), he was single and he was soon planning to come to my country (Trinidad) to do work for one of our oil companies. Over the next few weeks we fell out of touch. I would see him online but not message him. I guess, at the time, I had other stresses in my life. However, eventually we did start back talking and then the talking turned more serious after I broke up with my boyfriend.

Soon he was making the plans to travel here and I of course agreed when he said he wanted to meet me. I remember the day we met as though it was yesterday, it was a friday night in March'05 and I agreed to see him at the Hilton hotel here and well I got there and phoned his room from the lobby and he came down to meet me. The moment we saw each other I guess there was chemistry, he hugged me and told me "Good to see you".

Well things got steamy instantly, and soon we got into a sexual relationship. I longed for the moments I could see when he returned for more business here, and I did see him after that. Then in June '05, another friday, I was supposed to meet him, after seeing him earlier that week but he didn't contact me at all to tell me what time we could meet for. It was strange because I knew the next day he was flying out again. However I left it at that thinking he would contact me. I even phoned the hotel the next day, but he had already checked out. I emailed him but I got no response. Days passed without a word and initially I was worried... then weeks passed and my worry turned to frustration.

Eventually I found out he blocked me on his MSN so I couldn't see him online. I was confused. Three months passed, and for most of that three months I cried over him.... Until one of my friends who I introduced him to couldn't take seeing me in that state anymore and emailed him. He wrote back to her and me, and said a long story about his wife (WIFE? I was thoroughly confused at that point), and his daughter who his wife tried to leave his country with illegally and he spoke of trying to get divorced and his head being full and all that. He did start back talking to me after that and I tried to be normal and not ask him too many questions, I didn't want him to go away again. I guess I was just pathetic.

Another trip was bring planned for him to come to my country again. I wanted to see him again, despite what he had done. I was in love with this man. He did come, but he cut me off again when he was here. Just stopped talking to me. That was in Sept '05. I decided from then to move on an forget him and I was doing a pretty good job, but then in Nov '05 a strange email address added me to MSN. Interestingly it was him. AGAIN. At that point, I was hyperventilating. What was this man's problem? We did however resume talking and webcamming for the following months, but things had changed. Again, he was here in Feb '06, told me he would contact me when he got in, this was just a few days before he came. Again when he came he didn't contact me and subsequently blocked me from his MSN again. Did he think it was an "okay" thing to do? That I wouldn't be hurt? I was hurt and I still am hurt. I guess it's a lesson learned. I don't hate him or anything, but I hate what he has done and continues to do. Maybe in a few weeks he will start back talking to me like normal, but I've learned my lesson and changed all of my email addresses so he cannot step back into my life: even if he tried.

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