The Problem with Online Dating Services

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Online Dating Experience 17
The Problem with Online Dating Services
37 year old male from California

My experiences can really be called three experiences in one. I've tried numerous online dating services; it doesn't matter which name they go by. LavaLife, Match.com, you name it, they're basically all the same. When I tried eHarmony.com, for instance, I only got ONE match... she was 20 miles from me, and I live in a city of 10 million people! I decided right then and there to cancel and get my money back without even waiting for the woman's reply, because I was so turned off by this.

Second experience... my eyes were opened when all the women I've asked about it, agreed that when they were girls, their parents told them "never pick the man, always let him pick you". Great advice if you live in some male-dominated Third World country, but it doesn't work so well in the USA, where nobody has time to go out at night, hitting on strangers. This is why so many more men than women join dating services... the services themselves have long realized this, and that's why they have degenerated into little more than pyramid schemes which stay in business because of "losers". These are men who have not lost at the game of life, they are just greenhorns who have fallen for the whole dating scam and they haven't opened their eyes to how it works. Because if they did, that would be the end of the dating industry.

Third, if I couldn't count on the dating services for a mate, what was I supposed to do? Going out to clubs and hitting on women every night, doesn't pay the bills. I took the drastic step of creating what I call a "mate search site", which is something like a resume except it's not work-related. I've always wanted to be a loving husband, who would treat his wife with respect and dignity... but that's the problem with dating services, most of the people who use them don't expect to be treated decently. Knowing this, I'd never join a dating service, even if 99% of their clients were women and the memberships were free. Incidentally, I haven't really been making a full effort to promote my mate search site, but nevertheless a few women have stumbled across it and sent me very nice e-mails, saying how well-written it is. I will not divulge the name of my site in this message... but if you look hard enough online for it, you will find it.

Society is still in the process of learning how to use the Internet to find mates. I believe when most of us finally figure out a method that works, the dating service industry is going to find itself struggling to survive. My 2 cents.

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