Dating: A Job in Itself

I was out to dinner the other night and we spotted Steven Tyler. You know, that dude that’s in Aerosmith. He’s kind of hard to miss, but then you see him, and it’s like, “oh, it’s just Steve.” And he seemed very nice, talking to people, just eating some Thai food. I was immediately transported back in time and wanted to stand on the chair and burst into a Journey song:

“They say that the road ain’t no place to start a family! And lovin’ a music man ain’t always what it’s supposed to be!”

But I didn’t. I just went back to my Yum Tuna Salad, friends, and the Fast Times at Ridgemont High that was playing on the TV.

You see, the reason I was brought back in time was that I first began my writing career as a music journalist. This was back in college. The reason I began this was because I had really gotten into music—following these young singer-songwriters around New England. Basically, by starting to write about them, I got to interview a lot of boys with guitars. I was a happy girl.

But the more I followed them, the more I got to know the lifestyle, and the more I realized, I couldn’t be Mrs. Music Man. Could I make our home on a tour bus? Probably not. Would the guitar tech deliver our first child backstage in the dressing room? Eww. Sure, good stories for the grandkids, but not exactly how I envisioned my future.

Still, it works for some people, and I’d never turn down a sensitive singer-songwriter if he came my way and it seemed like a good match, but for some people, there are certain career choices that just seem to have warning signs when dating.

Here are a couple professions decoded, so that when you settle into that “first-date-chair” at the cozy restaurant and that question, “So, what do you do?” is popped, when the answer comes out, you’ll know what you’re getting.

Actor: It’s true, it’s all about them. If you like that, you’ll have to indulge them. If you want it to be all about you…step away. Or become an actor.

Construction: Whether he’s involved in construction or repair, he’ll probably be a good man to have around. Jobs like that take good skill and logic, and a lot of dedication. Also means…good with his hands.

Dentist: He’s already looked at your teeth, checked for cavities, and decided if you need any work done. Or perhaps braces. But…he’ll always tell you when you’ll have lettuce in your teeth. Which is a bonus, because the only thing more annoying than having lettuce in your teeth, is having lettuce in your teeth, and no one tell you.

Lawyer: They made time for a date, that’s a start. They will often try to prove you wrong, which might prompt you to argue back. Don’t let them win. It’s their job to argue. So if you fight back, they’ll find it endearing.

Teacher: If they teach college, they’ll think they know more than you. If they think they know more than you because they teach second grade math, tell them you took second grade math, and you aced it. If they do teach little ones, it can be cute that they have the patience to work with kids, and are sweet enough to engage those minds. However, after working with kids all day, they may not be in adult mode. You may have to ease them into it. So when you excuse yourself to go to the bathroom, and he says, “The potty is just around the corner,” don’t be offended.

Writer: Writers are often times secluded, unless they are on staff somewhere, but still, the job of writing is a pretty private thing, so this guy is usually in his head a lot. The date will allow an opportunity for him to break out and get to talk, but he may not be as used to vocally expressing himself. You may need to prompt him with some questions, but chances are, he has a lot to say.

Each profession holds many opportunities for an interesting date. But they are just jobs, what people do. The core of the person is what drew them to that job—what interests lie within that person propelled them to be a writer or teacher. Everyone has a story, and even if they go on and on and on and bore you with it, they’re probably having a good time telling it. So at the end of the date, if you realize, maybe Journey was right, loving a music man ain’t what it’s supposed to be. Then find the next Dentist and tell him: “I’m forever yours…faithfully.”

Dating Triumphs and Tragedies is published every Sunday by Online Dating Magazine columnist Nicole Roberge. She can be reached at NicoleMRoberge@hotmail.com.

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