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Dating Triumphs and Tragedies
by Nicole Roberge

Farmer's Market - Sweeter Than Fruit

Every Sunday I go to the Hollywood Farmers Market, and I usually just go, get some peaches and plums, and am then on my way. But this Sunday, I decided to wander a bit. And as I was enjoying my free sample of watermelon, I heard the voice. Then I looked to my right.

I think that’s James Earl Jones, I thought.

Hmm…better stick around for a second. James made a comment to me about how he had to get a watermelon for his sister, then go to work. All I could think about was how I finally had a good story to call home with. James went to pay. I migrated forward and pretended to show interest in some dried organic Fuji Apples.

“Sugar Free! No Preservatives!” yelled the man to me who was ringing up Mr. Jones…or Mr. Earl Jones.

Yeah, Yeah, I’m not really interested buddy. I thanked him anyway.

Meanwhile, Jimmy E. Jones grabbed his fruity purchase and was about to head on his way when he turned to me and said, “You’re an adorable girl. You’re going to make some guy very happy one day.” It was incredibly sweet. And it was then that I realized…he was definitely not James Earl Jones.

Slightly embarrassed, for the comment and my confusion, I thanked him for the sweet remark. He went on his way and I stood there for a moment until Apple man tried to pawn his nasty dried fruit off on me again. No thank you. Mmm… walnuts, fresh from the farm… I was on my way.

Even though it would have been cooler if he had in fact been the voice of Mufasa in The Lion King, I did appreciate the nice, and unexpected, comment from the man. It did put a smile on my face. It’s just that sometimes, it would be nice to hear those comments from the person who we want to hear them from. Well, the adorable part. You wouldn’t necessarily want to hear the object of your affection telling you that you’re going to make some other guy happy. Ouch.

But instead of worrying about who said it to me, maybe I should think about why it was said to me. Sure, it was just a random comment, and thoughtful, though he probably thought nothing of it afterwards. And not to get all philosophical, but maybe there’s a reason for the little compliments we get like that. Perhaps, once in a while, we need those little pick-me-ups to remind us that yes, I am going to make James Earl Jones, or…some other guy…very happy one day. But very often we get little compliments like that which we simply overlook. Maybe they are just little signs from the universe saying, “Hang in there,” and in addition to doing that, we should embrace these comments.

It’s easy to look at the negative. Of course, it would have nice if a Object of My Affection, or O.M.A., had said it, but let’s be honest, I’ll take what I can get. Regardless, that’s how we look at it. Sure, it’s nice, but it’d be nicer if Oma said it. Then we think, well, I don’t want Oma to say I’m an adorable girl, because then it makes me feel like I’m 16. It’s just a vicious cycle.

The point? I do have one. Two, actually.

1) Take advantage of every opportunity. If I hadn’t meandered from the peaches, I never would have gotten my sweet little remark that left me smiling for the rest of the day. When you go out, no matter where, you never know who you might encounter (maybe even James Earl Jones). So slow down, take everything in, and stop to smell the dried organic Fuji apples. Who knows what opportunities are right around the corner? Or at least at the cash register.

2) Never look at a positive as a negative. You’re only setting yourself up for discouragement. If someone gives you a compliment, take it. Don’t think of how it could have been better. Be happy you got it, because hey, if one person is thinking it…you never know who else could be.

So maybe I should just hang out at the Farmer’s Market more or at least linger around a bit. Instead of grabbing my peaches and leaving, wander through the market. Or better yet, open up my own stand. Yeah, sell myself. Now there’s a thought.

Dating Triumphs and Tragedies is published every Sunday by Online Dating Magazine columnist Nicole Roberge. She can be reached at

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