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Dating From the Inside Out
by Susan S. Davis

How Human Potential and Passion Factors Into Relationships

There is no end to what we can accomplish, just as there are no limitations upon our minds and thinking. Human potential manifests in many shapes and from many different bases, but usually, the most profound, is that which is instinctive.

Many times, we never know exactly what we are capable of, until circumstances manage to create a situation wherein, we must “rise to the occasion,” set aside doubt, and prior viewpoints, all negativity, and “just do it.” Those are often the most powerful, and life-defining moments in a person’s life; those times when there is absolutely no excuse, and little or no time to prepare for that moment. It just happens, organically.

For example, in times of severe stress, such as a life-threatening situation, war, or other disasters, we often discover courage that, we were never predisposed to. The same holds true in areas such as business, and sports, particularly in times of crisis. Magically, we find a side of ourselves emerging that we never really even knew existed.


Therefore, within us, we all have both realized and unrealized potential, in the form of talents and abilities. In addition, there are areas of potential that exist outside of us, that can become opportunities, from which to excel.

By increasing awareness and perception parameters, we can begin to actually see the possibility of opportunities surface, even possibly predict or imagine them. It is often through imagination that situations begin to materialize. When you think about it, the very first germination of anything begins with a thought.

The inclusion of other people’s perceptions can have a direct impact on the number of opportunities that seemingly arise from nowhere, just as the opposite can occur, in that negative energy can foster a lack thereof.

This is why it is so important to choose the people that you surround yourself with carefully. Many people spend more time deciding what kind of work environment and friendships they wish to have, than they ever do in the most intimate of all relationships: dating, sex and marriage. Oddly enough, it truly is the case, as evidenced by how many marriages don’t last, romantic involvements that shatter so quickly, and dating that seems to go nowhere. Often times, it is due to the simple fact that not enough time and research is spent in choosing the people we spend our time with. We often compromise our own realities, to engage in what usually turns out to be a very limited, and sometimes damaging liaison of the sort that, we would actually have been better without.

While it’s true that life experiences of all kinds can be enriching, it is also true that some situations, even though we can learn from them, would have been best avoided, and could have been, if a clear-headed viewpoint took the place of whimsy.

When you look at what happens when people combine their potentials with one another, in relationships and teams, it is clear that the effect can be truly powerful. Joining positive forces can conquer everything from evil, to invasion, to creating pure joy and bliss.

Conversely, consorting with individuals who do not hold to your value system on some level, will serve to cause the opposite effect of collaboration: disharmony and discord. The resultant negative energy can be disheartening to say the least; and otherwise detrimental on both psychic and ultimately, a physical level, as well.

The concept of synergy, simply stated, is the theory that the sum of the total surpasses that of the individual parts. In considering couples, it can be just as powerful, as when applied to a group of people. It means that more potential exists between two people, or within a group. In problem solving and decision-making, it often takes the burden off of one person, distributing it, instead, amongst two or more people, making it easier to deal with.

If one were to approach the idea of combining talents in a symbiotic way, potentials could be approached in two ways:

1. Those people interested in self-development; and

2. Issues relating to discovering the best candidates to form an alliance

The above can be applied to virtually any scenario, ranging from friendships, to career, to interpersonal relationships. If you think of the role of “partner” in a romantic involvement as a true psychic alliance, the whole focus of your search will change, than if you simply look for people to have a good time with, or whom are physically attractive. Suddenly, those individuals who looked so good before, will lose their attractiveness, at least, on levels other than physically.

If there were a reliable procedure for at least one of the above areas, a relatively sure-fire formula for finding the best human potential mates might exist.

Regardless of whether personal development, professional selection or orientation, is being addressed, it is necessary to understand what the potential of the person being considered, really is. Development alternatives arise from anything that the person is able to do, with pleasure, and what absorbs him/her completely, i.e., what they are passionate about. And those areas of passion and devotion, probably speak more to what a person is all about, than any other evaluative process available. Thus, finding out what the true passions of people are, is a very good place to start, when considering people to spend time with, date, or have a relationship with.

Susan S. Davis is a published book author and writer, currently doing research for a romantic screenplay she is writing. Her Dating From The Inside Out column is published every Tuesday.

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