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Dating From the Inside Out
by Susan
S. Davis
Conscious Love
Most people would agree, that love is
one of the more positive qualities that define humanity
and distinguishes us as human beings, perhaps from
other species. Both love and sexuality are sources
of life. Integrating those sources in a conscious and
positive way, is often viewed as an essential endeavor,
in life.
A peaceful culture is based on solidarity between
the sexes. While many people see the issues of love
and sexuality as exclusively personal affairs and try
to solve them privately, on a global view, love really
can be as political an issue as any other social and
cultural dilemma, and is just as important to develop
in order to balance the universe.
The above may sound crazy, but in the patriarchal
era, sensual love and sexuality were connected to
guilt, shame and fear. As a result, conflicts can
hardly be dealt with inside a relationship as they
are rooted elsewhere. Sobonfu Somé said, "It
takes a whole village to support the love of two
people.” Basically, what a single couple goes
through, when it comes down to it, really does affect
everyone who is in contact with them.
Where trust is present, love begins, often by itself,
to expand and include more people, which also apply
to erotic and sexual love. This leads organically to
the formation of a network of relationships where each
person has their place: a tapestry of varying intimacies,
intensities and qualities.
The Dalai Lama of Tibet, has famously said "Through
Universal Altruism we develop a feeling of true responsibility
toward others; the wish to help all actively over come
our problems."
History has shown, that there exists a direct correspondence
between human behavior, activities, and the institutions
that man has created on one hand, and on the other
hand, human consciousness (while it is the latter which
shapes and/or permits) either abuse, exploitation,
oppression, injury, and continued suffering to occur
on one hand if it is "unhealthy, dysfunctional,
and perverted/corrupted. Conversely, it can support
healing, liberation, creativity, integrity, and happiness
if it is healthy, functional, integrated, and holistic.
For many, the connection is obvious, that consciousness
shapes man's behavior, institutions, and politics;
while also, that man's environment, culture, institutions,
society, and experiences shape his/her consciousness.
The connection between consciousness and spiritual
context - between our persona and environment, should
be obvious to most human beings. However, modern day
urban institutionalized propaganda machines and rigid
institutionalized viewpoints, will refuse to link the
two; instead obviating them.
The two way street between consciousness and experiences,
allow and enable human beings who are aware, to change
the future positively through skillful, loving, wise
action. However, there still exists self interested
institutionalized forces who would rather that humans
not take the positive action, since their status quo
may be negatively impacted, as a result.
With the compensatory neurotic apparatus reinforced,
it then becomes difficult for the consumer to let go
of preconceived notions and realize, what had been,
a dormant higher potential.
Inner peace comes from a deep realization of who we
truly are - where the inner demons of the corruptive
mind have become conquered. Inner peace is a result
of realizing who we are in completion -- as in eternal,
unrequited love. In this space, there is no room for
hatred or fear, only love, joy, fulfillment, compassion,
and comfort. Generally, people who have reached a state
of fulfillment and joy, are neither insatiable nor
insecure. Successful people no longer incessantly strive,
but rather they engender peace and fullness, and later,
love.
As a general rule, loving people create more love,
rather than hate, murder, or war. One who has found
love, values and honors love, peace, and abundance,
attempts to enhance it. As such, peace is not passivity,
but active, and an activity of love. Such people
so engaged, would not honor systems that create scarcity,
competition, stealing from others, comparative advantage,
war, or strife.
Similarly, people who love and honor freedom do not
enslave, oppress, nor support totalitarian police states;
rather, they become engaged in activities which liberate,
remove suffering, heal, and celebrate life. And those
are generally the types of people that attract love.
Processes based on love and peace do not encourage
nor reward suffering, comparative advantage, greed,
jealousy, adversity, hatred, fear, competition, strife,
and more confusion. While it doesn't take a genius
to figure this out, it does require a relatively
healthy mind and a good heart.
It is taken as a given, that people collectively moved
by transpersonal universal love are capable of accomplishing
a great many things, and that when people’s actions
are motivated by the universal non-duality of spiritual
source, they act in alignment and harmony with the
natural joy of spirit, healing, abundance, wealth,
peace, and the true happiness it manifests.
The basic assumption of a natural altruistic ambition,
forms a powerful momentum of its own, opposing the
idea that man must be motivated by the whip, by scarcity,
conflict, competition, fear, intimidation, greed, threat,
or negative ambition.
If communication about love is cultivated, love can
then become more free of the fear of abandonment,
lies and pretense. The bigger the social and mental
and spiritual context for love is, the easier it
is to deal with difficulties in a playful and unidentified
way. As a result, it’s easier to give more
attention to positivity and less to negativity. The
more truth that is found, the more power and love
there is to give the world, overall. It could be,
that finding individual love may, in fact, depend
greatly upon garnering more love first, within the
environment, on a much higher scale.
By focusing on the “bigger picture” of
the world, it may be easier to then accomplish personal
goals, since the environments in which we live usually
inform our individual lives. In fact, by doing so,
we may actually attract like-minded people with whom
to align personal and world goals, thereby accomplishing
both universal and personal interests, at the same
time, one, as a direct result, of the other.
Susan S. Davis is a published book author and writer,
currently doing research for a romantic screenplay
she is writing. Her Dating
From The Inside Out column
is published every Tuesday.
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