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Online Dating Magazine > Columns > Dating From the Inside Out > 84

Dating From the Inside Out
by Susan S. Davis

Making Dating Goals Tangible

Many people would not think of time management and goal setting, as an important component to reaching social, dating and relationship goals. But the reality is that those who want to succeed know that it is impossible to do everything; they adapt to learning to focus on their most important tasks, ensuring to get those things done.

Therefore, if dating and interpersonal relationships are important to you, tasks relating to that enterprise, need to be handled. Quite simply, many people are probably not content with the dating, social and relationship aspects of their lives, mainly because they never seem to make time for that area of their lives. Surprisingly, a lot of people may not even think of that as a possibility: that time management could, in fact, play a very distinct and direct role as to why their personal lives never develop to their satisfaction. The fact is, that everything we do requires time.

 

Most worthwhile things, particularly those that we aspire to, do not just magically ‘’happen,’’ they are cultivated in some manner, even if indirectly. And sometimes, we may find other things that we are looking for, in places that we may never have thought possible. The main thing is that we focus on our goals, dreams, aspirations, and what motivates us in that regard.

In order to really develop interpersonal relationships, basically the very same time management and goal theorems need to be applied as the ones that would be applied to a career or any other endeavor. Perhaps, even more so. This is because, unlike something a little more finite as a career, education, or financial goal, interpersonal relationships are ever-changing and evolving, and far more components exist, because of the more spiritual and emotional factors. Those issues make goal setting and time management even more challenging than the usual types of desires that may be assigned a plan in order to accomplish them.

Time management experts have always recommended tackling the most challenging task of the day, first. That way, it is more likely that procrastination issues will be handled, and that the more important tasks to accomplish, will be take care of, leaving room for more planning and less waste of time.

In a nutshell, basic time management setting and goal achievement consists of:

1 - Decide exactly what you want. This is key. It may take some time to accomplish this, in fact, more time than any of the other below targets, but it is time worth spent. In fact, it is the most important component, because, without it, thing will really be done at all, or what is done, will not be worthwhile.

2 – Give the goal tangible forms, by writing them down. Goals that aren’t written often simply become fantasies.

3 - Set deadlines. Try to be as realistic as possible. Create sub-deadlines if necessary. While the dates are not set in stone, they become a measurement, a way of tracking progress. They can be adjusted as things progress.

4 – List out everything that must be done to achieve each goal.

5 - Organize the list(s) into a plan, by priority and in sequence. This can also be done as a flow chart.

6 – Once the above is done, take action on at least one plan immediately. Execution is absolutely everything. By starting on the plan, it is put into action, which validates the plan and creates more possibility of success.

7 - Resolve to do something each and every day that progresses toward achieving the goal(s)

Once the above is accomplished, it is easier to making strategizing a habit. Once 1) the strategic planning process begins, and 2) the mission is articulated in line with the vision, it can be reviewed, and priorities set.

Narrowing down options to a select few, can be one of the most important aspects of goal setting, especially in terms of interpersonal relationships. Successful people do not try to do everything; they isolate the most important factors that align with their objectives. The same holds true for dating and relationships. For example, dating too many people, for example, at one time, can serve to clutter up your social situation, and disallow for the possibility to create quality friendships, that can then progress to more serious types of involvements.

It is important to maintain focus. Balancing out strategic priorities, should become the hallmark of your social planning. This particular management tool can help to ensure a more holistically structured strategy framework that is useful for any application of goal and time management system. It is particularly helpful in very personal goals, because it can keep the focus where it needs to be. With regard to friendships and dating, it can be very easy to go off track. We all make concessions and justify staying involved in situations that are not really a part of our desires – for a myriad of reasons. So staying on track is even more of a challenge, and applying basic goal and time management tactics, can be the thing that will set apart accomplishing those goals or not.

As time goes on, it is a good idea to take the time to carefully assess the goals created, to adjust them as necessary. It is also a good idea, to keep track of the goals that are actually accomplished. But just as it is important to create and track goals, it is essential to make new ones. Growth and accomplishment are nourished by new objectives. And the above tactics can be used to keep success measures in tact, and save time in the long run. By putting the above into practice, it will be more possible to accelerate an overall dating and relationship strategy, which can serve to ensure a better chance at finding the types of people that you want in your life.



Susan S. Davis is a published book author and writer, currently doing research for a romantic screenplay she is writing. Her Dating From The Inside Out column is published every Tuesday.


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