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by Kim Lance, associate publisher of Online Dating Magazine

Find Stronger Connections Through Old Memories

In the beginning of a relationship, you remember everything about your experiences with your partner. You can recall the first thing he ever said to you or the romantic movie you first held hands during. Every event makes such an impact, making every memory very strong and current in your mind. The longer you continue with a loving relationship, the more memories you begin to develop together.

While you are so lucky when you have a partner that you can create hundreds of happy memories with, unfortunately the human brain can only actively take on so much information. So…our memories often get stored away in the nooks and crannies of our mind, sometimes forgotten for a long time. Often, the longer you are in a relationship, the more memories slip away from you.


But don’t worry, there are several ways to bring those long-forgotten memories back out into the open to enjoy and bring you two closer together. The great thing about memories is that the littlest thing can bring them back into the forefront of your mind. If you and your partner have been in a relationship for a long time, it is important to not let go of all of the events, conversations, and dates that brought you so close together in the first place. They are a very important part of your relationship and need to continue to be cherished.

One good way to bring back all the old memories is to make a night out of it. Plan an evening with your partner where you will purposely plan on digging up all of those old memories. Here are a few ways you can organize your evening.

Great Conversation Over Dinner
Plan your favorite meal with the idea in mind that your evening will be focused on remembering a lot of the wonderful experiences that you have had as a couple. You can start the evening off with dinner at home or a nice quiet restaurant. Someplace where you can comfortably talk with one another without having to shout over the crowd. Try to focus your conversation during dinner on some of your wonderful memories like the first time you met, your first date, and when each of you knew you loved the other. As conversation gets more interesting, you will start to remember more and more and, most likely, won't want the conversation to end.

Walk Down Memory Lane
Really make it a walk down memory lane by taking a stroll together after dinner, still engaging in conversation about the hundreds of fun, happy, and positive experiences you have shared. You can even make up a game for the two of you to play to spark even more memories. Quiz each other on details of past dates and important events (just promise not to get mad if your partner doesn't remember some of the things that you do). See if he knows the color roses he gave you for your first anniversary or see if she remembers what cologne you wore on your first few dates. It can be a fun challenge and really stretch your mind to remember how much fun you have had together during your relationship.

Photos Can Spark Memories
When you return home, pull out your old photo albums (or create a slideshow of digital photos on your computer) and try and remember the circumstances associated with each photo. You can take it a step further with old memorabilia, letters or your personal diaries of that time. You will be amazed how much you had stored in the back of your mind that some photos can bring out!

A very important part of every relationship is the plethora of happy memories that partners shape and share between the two of them. Don’t let those memories become just a part of the past; bring them back to life by actively trying to remember them and, for those you don’t remember on your own, going through old photos and memorabilia to bring those memories back. As you and your partner share a laugh and warm feelings because of theses happy memories, you will be glad you took the time to dust off your old scrapbooks and diaries. You and your partner will not only reconnect the memories in your own minds, but also reconnect with the feelings you had during the early stages of your relationship and, in turn, form a deeper connection with each other.

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