A Song About Online Dating

This is a rather interesting and humorous online dating song that focuses on things that people lie about in their online dating profiles. Under the video we have published the lyrics to the song. If you’re on Pinterest, be sure to Pin it!

A Song About Online Dating

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Online Dating Song Lyrics

Creepin’ through the profiles
Fishin’ in the pool
Rating guys and sending winks
And trying not to hurl

You’ve got no shirt on, Baby
Well that’s original
Let me guess, you’re so laid back
Just want  that special… special girl

I know what you’re hiding
When you wear a baseball cap
And saying that your “average”
Is just code for “I’m fat”

Don’t care ’bout your hobbies
If you look like Sasquatch
Just about when he seems OK
He sends a picture of his… of his crotch

You make Nigerian Scammers
look legit
I can’t believe you tried to sell me
all of this shit

That picture’s from 10 years ago
You’re way below the status quo
Unemployed, receding hair
My desperation’s not quite there

So your user name is MAGNUM
And includes a 69
I see you have a tear tattoo
I’ll assume you  have done time

Well on the theme of turn offs
Don’t lie about your height
I may be superficial
But mister you are not Mr. Right

You make Nigerian Scammers
look legit
I can’t believe you tried to sell me
all of this shit

You say that you’re a solid catch
Claim we are a perfect match
You’re twice my age and half my size
It’s time to stop spreading these lies

You’re profile is so whiny
Claiming “nice guys finish last”
That’s almost as appealing
As hearing you’ve got crabs

Your grammar is as appalling
As the cheesy lines you use
If I fell from Heaven
I wasn’t put on earth for you

You make Nigerian Scammers
look legit
I can’t believe you tried to sell me
all of this shit

I’m shopping in the discount store
Your occupation says “actor”
This online shit it kills my soul
And yet I just can’t let it go

 

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