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Letter to the Editor:
Both Guys and Dolls are too Blame I
have lived a very exciting and wondrous life. I’ve
had many opportunities and have been exposed to all
kinds of situations and people. Through these experiences
I’ve dated many kinds of women. And though armed
with such experiences, it seems no matter where I go
the men are always the bad guys. Whether I personally
gaze, or spot over my sister’s shoulder at the
Seventeen, Cosmo, Vogue or any other teen-girl or women’s
magazine; whether it be in Hong Kong, Singapore, Australia,
Russia, USA, England or Africa; every woman or girl
seems to be quoting the same thing about every guy
around no matter where.
Now,
I ask is it really possible that all these subscribers,
editors and readers, have never found a decent man?
Answer: Unlikely! I picked this article not because
it frustrated me the most but instead was the last
straw. The article “Eight
Warning Signs That He is Going to End it,” vindictively
points out that it’s all him. He is the problem
in the relationship and he spawns the only cause for
it to end. Using the word “He” is wrong,
when a more appropriate choice of “spouse” or “partner” would
at least be fair. I’m not stating many men aren’t
shallow and use immature tactics to end relationships
such as warning sign #1. “He hasn’t called
you for a few days,” or #5. “He’d
rather spend time with his friends than you.” Because
it’s a given some do... but so do women. We are
not always to blame.
Instead
of quickly jumping to conclusions that your relationship
is on the ropes, and pointing the finger at “He” as
to blame, step back and wonder if “he” just
needs a night out with the boys; and “he” just
needs a break from you,” and vise versa. Friends
get sick of each other and need alone time, and so
do you and your partner.
I
ask all the female readers to ponder the question “why
do men of the 21st century almost seem to prefer
one night stands or short term relationships opposed
to the long term?” Could
it honestly be that we are the shallower less emotional
caring sex? Or the fact that maybe you’ve given
us a reason to be? That many women are looking for
free rides? The date might not be the sharpest tool
in the shed (in looks, brains, sexual capabilities)
but as long as dinner and a movie are included… sure
she’s game. Some of us are this in-fact, heartless
only sex driven chauvinistic pig. But no women can
honestly believe the argument, ‘women don’t
use their sexuality to their advantage’. And
yet, you still wonder why we're gone by the time you
wake up.
I
ask women to give the rest of us, those who care,
are gentlemen-like, and do want a respectable relationship
a break. There’s nothing wrong with
a night out with the boys or Monday Night Football.
If you’re unsure of his worthiness, take a step
back instead of jumping to conclusions. I constantly
ask my mother, 'How can I find the right woman for
me?' and she always answers, 'Don't worry about finding
the right woman- concentrate on becoming the right
man.'”
Women,
please do the same.
~ Paul Reay
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