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Dating Triumphs and Tragedies
by Nicole Roberge

Dating by Age

I was recently talking to an old teacher of mine and she asked how my dating life was going. Good question, right? So I told her and then she went on, and on, and on. She told me that at my age, almost 27, I am at the point where men are either getting out of long term relationships or have been married and have been divorced, or even have kids, and that’s something I have to accept. She event told me that she got married at 27 and they handed her a copy of “Young Bride,” and she scoffed at it, thinking she was not a young bride. Is 27 not young? Am I an old maid already? Yikes!

It kind of freaked me out. I mean, my sister got married at 27, and though I am about to turn 27, I hadn’t had any fears or anxieties of meeting “the one” or getting married. I, in fact, think age has nothing to do with it. Maybe it’s just me, but in this day and age, I think that people get married at all ages. I have friends that have gotten married at aged 40. Some of them have worked on their professional careers first and then worked on their relationships, and some of them just haven’t met the right person until then. In either case, I’m still a firm believer that age doesn’t matter

I say, so what? Yes, I will be 27 this month. I have dated a lot of good guys and a lot of…not so good guys. But that’s what dating is. I can’t choose when I’m going to meet the right guy. I can’t say… “I want to get married at 27 and to this particular guy.” Love doesn’t happen like that. It’s all about meeting the right person at the right time, and usually, it’s a tricky situation. That’s what dating is.

But people have their different ideals of what dating is and how quick it progresses. I dated one guy…well, once…we went on one date…and after that date, he wanted me over all the time. He practically wanted me to move in. And let me tell you, I was not into that at all. Maybe he had the idea of marriage inside of him, but that was pushing it for me. Needless to say, that relationship did not work out.

Last year, I was with a guy who I truly thought I was going to marry. We talked about it, we talked about kids…everything seemed perfect. But as all relationships go, things change, and things didn’t work out. So…there that relationship went, and yes, it was hard, because I thought my future was so clear, but I had to move on. It is hard to move on when someone who you think is “perfect” for you ends up being, well, not so great, but it’s a step you have to take. Trust me, it took a lot of time for me to get over that, but it does happen, and yes, I did date again. Not everything works out perfectly, but it does work out.

The important thing is not to be worried about when you’re going to be engaged or be married. Who sets these rules anyway? Not me. Some people get married when they’re 60! It’s all about meeting the right person at the right time and knowing that they are right for you. Granted, that’s hard to come by, but it does happen. I have seen it happen. It does happen and it does work. Sometimes, you just have to work at it. But that’s what dating and relationships are. Work. Sucks sometimes, doesn’t it? Sometimes it seems never-ending, but eventually you will find someone that works for you and that you are compatible with. It just happens. You may not even expect it at the time, but the right person will come along, and you’ll be surprised. Happily, surprised. So don’t worry whether you’re 23, 30, or 45…love is in the air for everyone. It happens at different times and at different moments. The important thing is, you just have to be patient and wait for it. It will come, I promise.

Dating Triumphs and Tragedies is published every Sunday by Online Dating Magazine columnist Nicole Roberge. She can be reached at [email protected].

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