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Dating Tips Advice Column:
How Can a Shorter Man Get
Dates Online?
Dear Dating Tips,
Here's
my problem. I'm 28, 5'2 and I have trouble finding a date. I'm fairly certain
my profile doesn't
come up in women's search results on the dating sites
because of my height (does anyone actually put a minimum
height of 5'0?) and after a year and a half of online
dating, I've only been able to go out with two women.
Most women do not respond and the ones that do usually
say
something like "You sound like a great guy but
I'm looking for a taller man" blah blah blah.
I don't want to lie on my profile but after sending
hundreds of emails and trying three dating sites (Match.com, LavaLife,
Cupid Junction),
I just want to give up.
Online
dating was my last resort. I didn't have any luck
with the club/bar scene, and it seems all my friends/family
seem to only know single women who are taller than
me and not interested in me so I decided to try online
dating; but it only seems to mirror my club/bar experiences.
I truly believe I'm a great guy and a great catch...
I'm single, never been married, no kids, great career
with a six figure salary and living in my own apartment.
Yet all of that takes a back-seat to my height. I don't
know what other options I have other than to follow
another dating site's advice to me, which was "keep
your head up and you'll find someone eventually." What
advice can you give me? Should I just give up? ~ Frustration
Setting In
Dear Frustration Setting In,
You've asked an excellent question. Before getting
to my response, you should probably know that men of
regular height have many frustrations too with online
dating. It's not unusual for great men and women to
get frustrated with the online dating scene and take
a short break away from it.
As you already know, the majority of women like to
date men who are tall or at least taller than them.
And while that may set you at an immediate disadvantage,
it isn't
an impossible
challenge
for
you to find an
incredible woman who looks at you for who you are and
not how tall you are.
Here are a few tips that may help:
1) Don't lie in your online dating profile. Under
the height requirement be honest, however don't mention
your height anywhere in your profile. For many people,
if they see it is an issue with you then it will be
an issue with them.
2) Work on getting into great shape (hire a personal
trainer). Learn how to dress for success and purchase
clothes that really make you shine. Ideally, you are
trying to improve all other outward appearance areas,
even if that takes several months. Once you've accomplished
this, have your photo professionally taken for your
online profile.
3) Consider hiring a service to write your
online profile. There are several services
that have a staff of creative and
professional writers
that focus only on writing online dating profiles.
4) Learn things that build your personality
and intrigue to women. For example, take
the time to learn magic. When on a date, doing
some "table magic" (like asking
the girl for a $1 then turning it into a $20 before
her eyes and thanking her for dinner) really adds
an interesting dimension about you in her eyes.
Most important is to not talk about your height to
others. If you see it as a non-issue then those you
impress will see it as a non-issue also.
Alternatively,
you may want to take a break from online dating and
start volunteering for various organizations that
put you in touch with other volunteers. Women who
find you intriguing and a good listener may
develop an attraction to you despite your height. A
dynamic personality and unstoppable confidence can
win women over, even if you're shorter than other men.
Work on improving the things you can and you'll see
better success in the area of dating. ~ The Dating
Tipster
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