We live in a fast-paced world. Advancing technology is aimed at helping busy people accomplish more in a quicker amount of time. When companies lay off employees they expect existing employees to pick up the additional workload. As a result many people find themselves becoming workaholics, a condition that is prominent in Japan and growing in the United States.
Clinical studies have shown that people who are workaholics have less time to interact with others and as a result, their social lives suffer. Workaholics tend to date less, do fewer team projects, and rarely attend social events. So how in the world are they supposed to find love?
SEE ALSO: 10 Dating Tips for Men
This article explores some key dating tips for workaholics and some suggestions for becoming a bit more social and a tad less frantic.
It may come as a surprise, but studies have found that people who are workaholics tend to get less accomplished than those who aren’t. The reason, studies found, is that workaholics tend to have more anxiety, stress and get less sleep. That leads to health issues like frequent headaches, back pain, and higher susceptibility to colds and flus. As a result, while workaholics were found to operate quickly, they weren’t as efficient. They lacked what has been termed as “peak performance” in which a person operates at a highly efficient state allowing more to be done in a shorter period of time.
While most workaholics fall into the above category, there is a different type of workaholic – the “healthy” workaholic. A healthy workaholic is someone who works hard and long because they absolutely love the work they do. They not only love to work hard, but they also love to delegate work, not feeling the need to “control” everything. They feel good with the long hours they work and get emotional benefits from their accomplishments. As long as a “healthy” workaholic can keep their dating life in balance, the rewards can be great.
Workaholics and Dating
When it comes to love and dating, workaholics are generally given the label of “bad partners”. Movies, books, and videos generally warn against getting into a relationship with a workaholic. Marilyn Anderson is the author of the book Never Kiss a Frog: A Girl’s Guide to Creatures from the Dating Swamp which provides dating advice for women. As a marketing tool for her book she has created some clever reenactments of the various “frogs” in the swampland of dating. One she calls the “All Work and No Play Frog”. It’s the guy that is always busy with work. Here’s the video:
So from the get-go the deck is stacked against a workaholic looking for love. Luckily there are some dating tips that may help.
Workaholic Dating Tips
The emergence of online dating for finding dates is one of the best things ever to happen for shy people and workaholics. With a limited time investment, you will be able to communicate with some people that may be a good match for you. The following tips (online and offline) can help you find that date and progress beyond a first meeting.
Tip #1: Be honest in your profile. You want someone to date you for who you are and if you create a false persona online then you’ll never find that perfect match. Include in your profile that you are passionate about work and state the type of person you are looking for (i.e. “someone else who is passionate about their work”).
Tip #2: Respond promptly. If you are as passionate about finding the love of your life as you are about work then you can quickly create a win-win situation. Unfortunately a lot of workaholics are known as “social procrastinators” and that is one of the reasons they are labeled “undateable”. Make sure you don’t fall into this trap by giving proper attention and promptness to messages you receive and send. Use your time wisely to learn more about your potential date. Now’s not the time to talk about your passion for work.
Tip #3: Do not keep your date waiting on the first date (or any date beyond that). Set your smart phone scheduler to make sure you are ready and at the place you are meeting at least 10 minutes early. You can be a workaholic and still be on time. You don’t have to be like the guy in the Never Kiss a Frog video.
Tip #4: Do not talk about work on your first date. When a person is passionate about something, they tend to spend too much time talking about it in the presence of others and that can be a turnoff for your date. Instead, invest your date time into asking questions and getting to know what your date is passionate about.
Tip #5: Turn off your cell phone on your date. Getting a call or text message in the middle of a date is extremely annoying to your date. Learn that some things are, indeed, more important than work and the date you are on is one of them.
Tip #6: Schedule “Date Nights”. Once you enter into a relationship, some of the “passion” you had for getting to know the other person may start to dwindle and you may find yourself doing more work and less socializing with your partner. By scheduling date nights you help avoid falling into a rut that can destroy your relationship. Most of all, learn to put on your “listening ears” when your partner shares his/her feelings about the relationship. The rewards for doing so are vast.
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There is an alternative to the above tips and that is to become less of a workaholic and more like one of those “peak performance” employees/bosses that achieve a large amount of work in a small amount of time. You may find the extra sleep, relaxation, and social time comes with many benefits, including a very happy partner.